What is 'Saving Face' in Asia?

Asian countries believe very strongly in the opinion of 'Face'. In some countries more than others, perhaps, but it is a ubiquitous feature of Asian life. Many Asians live their life by 'saving face' that is, not embarrassing oneself or another.

A excellent face saver would avoid all situations and topics of conversation which might cause embarrassment to anyone. If person notices that person else, say a neighbour, is experiencing a problem, the face-saver will pretend not to notice, unless the neighbour complains or asks for help.

Asia

In Thailand, there is an irregularity to this rule and that is in the case of a minor accident, say spilling your tea down your shirt or tripping up. A Thai would laugh. That may not sound a very nice thing to do, but actually, it gives the person who had the crisis the occasion to laugh the crisis off, thereby saving face. This is probably the origin of the sublime Thai smile as a smile is appropriate to more situations than any other response.

What is 'Saving Face' in Asia?

It is never appropriate to get angry or raise your voice, since getting angry implies that person has not done something properly and that you cannot operate your temper. Therefore, if person gets angry, it means that everybody loses face. Even onlookers, as they will feel embarrassed. We know that in the West too, think of when a couple are having a domestic seminar in public.

In Asia, it is regularly the foreigner who gets angry and shouts in public. This has given us the prestige of being noisy, rude and pushy. Some Asians will get their own back on such a person by serving him last or ignoring him altogether.

Face extends to one's communal responsibility too. There are natural or at least historical hierarchies in all societies. In many Asian countries, this depends on age, rank and wealth. Young population are meant to defer to older people. You are meant to defer to your boss or teacher or anybody with more money or a better job than you. Civilians should defer to the troops and foreigners Should defer to the indigenous population. If you don't defer when you should, You lose face for not knowing the rules. Nobody cares whether you agree with the rules, you came to their country. You defer.

On the other hand, the superior has obligations too. He should take care of the basic well-being of those who defer to him. Not everybody younger or whatever, but those who defer whom he knows. He must grant small favours of monetary loans or gifts, employment, if it's within his power and pay for meals in a restaurant. To not do so, would mean he loses face big time. He cannot afford not to, in fact.

I will conclude this article on face with an example that I think demonstrates face-saving under testing conditions. A friend of mine was having a gazebo built, a very flashy and quite costly one. The evening that the buildings was finished, his wife was watering the garden, when she noticed some materials private under bushes in the field next door. The next morning the manufacturer came back to clean up the debris and collect his payment. To everyone's surprise but one, there was a pile of excess materials neatly stacked in the orchad and when the previously-agreed bill was presented, the manufacturer offered a prompt cost discount. Nobody knew anything, except the manufacturer and my friend's wife. She told him later and he told me. The manufacturer knew that he had been caught stealing, but the wife did not want to cause any embarrassment and the grateful manufacturer rewarded her with a discount. 

What is 'Saving Face' in Asia?